So… on with the venting already

i feel blurry. i can’t concentrate anymore. you know when you can’t sleep, you can’t stop thinking, and you can’t resolve the issue.

I’m gonna attach pictures of my scars here. i want to work out how. i can’t stop looking, and i havent cut in months. in greece i didnt cut, well i did once but it was tiny and i started throwing rocks after, so a massive improvement.

i dont think i punched anyone. no, wait, i think i may have. i dont know, thats the point – i drink too much to the point where i wouldnt have a clue. I probably bit my sister. I think I do it to tell her something is wrong, but it just comes out as a bite.

met a boyfriend. a good one. an independant one who will be there when i need him, and can admit to needing him, but who doesnt want me to need him, who just wants to fall in. =0) so thats good.

i cant sleep. i comm..

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AHAHAHAHAHA! I’m so happy! SA rang me cause earlier i text him saying how much i was struggling, and he made me feel so much better. just being able to ask him to stay on the phone was incredible. he’s so good for me! i dont want to do anything written above now!

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Ps: seeing as i probably did hit someone, freaked out at tagged photos of me where you could see, and genuinly hide from my parents, i think i failed on all three goals. BUT – i was happier with myself out there, and i’m slowly growing to accept myself and deal with my feelings in a more positive way.

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=0) so happy so so happy

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quickly being deflated. going to stop writing now!

~ by chinaface on August 28, 2008.